Nowhere else, at no other time, have I questioned my personality, or humanity, as I did in Vang Vieng. Alright, the humanity portion of that statement is an exaggeration, but only slightly. Vang Vieng is notorious for several things: tubing, alcohol, drugs, and promiscuity. Everything a guy in his mid-twenties could ask for, right? Well, for most people, yes, but not for me. I hated the place until I did something that was not one of those four things.
This is how most people spend their days in Vang Vieng: wake up hungover in the early afternoon. Get a quick sandwich and hire a tube. Sit on a tube for 10 seconds, get off the tube, and drink and dance for 30 minutes to 6 hours. If closer to the 30 minutes end of that spectrum, get back on the tube for another 10 seconds, get off the tube, and drink and dance for 30 minutes to 6 hours. Repeat until you passout, end up going back to "town" with somebody, run out of money (though this does not necessarily stop people), or it gets too dark. Once in town, some take a quick nap in preparation for the nights activities, other just shower, most do neither. Go to a "TV bar" which serves overpriced, bad food while playing episodes of Friends endlessly. Once it is around 8:30 got to Bucket Bar for free buckets for a couple hours. (A "bucket" is Coke, rank Lao whiskey called Lao Lao, and sometimes lime and/or fake Red Bull.) When Bucket Bar plays Wonderwall by Oasis it is time to leave and head to two bars down to Rock Bar, which does not rock, and drink until they close, usually around 5AM. Now it is time to head back to your guesthouse if you are a guy and back to the guesthouse of the guy you met if you are a girl.
Writing that paragraph all I could think was, "This place sounds awesome." And it is for most people. But, for me, in practice, I hated it. Until I veered far from that typical day, Vang Vieng was easily my least favorite place I have been in the world. Seriously. Most people love it. I understand why, it just is not my scene. There is absolutely nothing Laos about Vang Vieng. It is full of Westerns; all the employees of the bars are Westerners that get compensated with accommodation, food, and drink. Many stay here for years. and they do not remember any of it when they finally leave.
While there I began to think there was something wrong with me. That I should be enjoying myself. Several times I sat down trying to figure out what flaws or defects did I have were causing me to be miserable. Then it occurred to me that I was not at fault. There was no issue with me that made me feel the way I did. It was simple: I just despised just about every person there in the capacity that I knew them. If I met these people in a different context I would surely end up liking some but not in Vang Vieng.
Finally I did something else. I rented a bicycle and went west to ride what is called the West Loop. I met some English girl who hated all that as much as I did and a German guy who just liked all that but wanted to go for a bike ride. We spent the day together and had a good time going to the Blue Lagoon and getting lost. It was a pretty ardours day as I biked about 45km (30 miles) on a neglected, old bike on terrible, rocky paths. It was fun but I was sore by the end of the day.
I left Vang Vieng not hating it as I did for most my time there but I cannot tell you I liked it either. The biking was good but I can do that elsewhere.
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